


Black Leather

by floatingpetals



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Blood, F/M, Lots of Angst, Mentions of Violence, Mutant Reader, Reader-Insert, Winged Reader, bucky messes up, reader just wants to fit in
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-04
Updated: 2018-12-03
Packaged: 2019-09-06 21:29:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,921
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16840765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/floatingpetals/pseuds/floatingpetals
Summary: Request:  Would you do a bucky/ fem reader where the reader has wings?





	1. Chapter 1

Her entire life had always been cruel. She always stood out of the crowds, never fit in anywhere. Her own parents hadn’t wanted her, didn’t want to be saddled with such an abomination. They tossed her aside like everyone else they in her life. No one knew where she inherited the genes either, no one in her family ever had what she had. They didn’t know why she was born the way she was, and they never let her forget it. She’d never be normal, she’d always be labeled a freak.

In her younger years, she was ashamed of who she was. She wanted so badly to just remove her ‘deformity’ so she could be normal. Yet as she grew older, she realized it was really a gift. Midnight black wings had grown from her wings since birth, bony, leathery, and large with sharp claws at the top; she never forgot they were there. She heard every name in the book. ‘Devil child’, ‘Spawn of Satan’ or just her favorite ‘Demon’. She had heard it all. When she was younger, she’d argue til she was blue in the face against the names, but it made no difference. Now, she no longer argues. ‘Let them think what they want,’ she would tell herself. She convinced herself it no longer hurt her, that she was numb to the pain. However, she could only lie for so long

All her life, she lived with knowing no one wanted her and no one ever would. She learned to hide in the shadows, to live in darkness. Along the way, she learned and mastered the art of stealth. Even with the enormous wings furled behind her, she moved silently through the night and found a way to earn a wage. She could find ways into buildings that others couldn’t, could slip through and swipe whatever her client needed. Sometimes it was information, most of the time it was stealing someone’s precious possessions. She didn’t care what the job was, just that she’d get paid in the end. She was so efficient, she quickly became known as ‘The Devil’s Shadow.’ She hated it, but let them say what they wanted. Perhaps her infamy was how Tony had come across her.

Y/N was forced to jump from place to place, never staying in more than one location for too long. The day she met Tony, she just returned from the grocery store, sighing as she walked into her rundown, cheap apartment. There he sat at her sad table with on the even more depression fold out chair.

“You live like this?” She hadn’t seen him, she never turned on any lights in the apartment when she entered. At his shocked timber behind her, she let out a shrill scream and spun around.

“Who the fuck are you?” She shrieked, backing away from the table. Tony gave her a cocky grin, ignoring her question in favor of wrinkling his nose at the room around him.

“I can’t even imagine living in this filth- Is that a rat?” He balked, eyes wide at the rodent that perched on the counter. Y/N barely gave it a glance, her body shaking in fear. No one ever came to find her before, they all never wanted to see the woman they asked services of. Tony didn’t seem to care he had startled her and he broke into her house. His eyes turned back to her, squinting in the darkness. “Mind if I turn on a light?”

“No!” She cried, but he was already up and flicking on the light switch. She shrank back more, biting her lower lip. She wasn’t ashamed of her wings, not anymore, but she still hated people staring. He broke into her home, scared the crap out of her, and ignored her comfort. Rage was quickly filling her.

Tony tried not to stare, he really did try. He knew she wasn’t keen on other seeing her gift, something that he always questioned. He had heard of how she was treated as a child, saw the foster home investigations. It was one of the first things that struck a chord with him about her; she has always been labeled a monster. Just because she was born different, didn’t mean she was the ‘spawn of Satan.’ Needing her to know he was here with good reason, he began to step forward, her name on his lips. Her lips pulled back, baring her teeth when he did.

“No!” She hissed, taking two large steps forward. The room was small, but it didn’t stop her from spreading her wings. Nearly twice her size, her powerful black wings flapped, nearly knocking Tony back at the force. He caught himself on his knees, gasping in shock. She stood in the center of the room, first tightly at her side and breath ragged. It wasn’t often Tony found himself speechless, but at the sight of Y/N standing her ground, wings spread wide, he felt the air leave his lungs.

She hated how he gawked that night, was ready to knock him back again and take flight out of the window. Her brain was already racing to find a new place to live, a temporary dwelling that would lose her trail. Her wings twitched as she worked her plan, but the awestruck words that slipped from his lips caused her pause.

“Beautiful.” His eyes never left her wings, taking in every detail he could, following every vein and bone underneath the thin skin. His words seemed so genuine as if he really thought that of her lifelong burden.

She froze, never having heard anyone describe them that way. Tony took the chance and told her why he was there. He didn’t want her to run anymore. He promised her a home, where there were others like her that she could be apart of. She’d be safe, she wouldn’t have to run anymore. No one would judge her anymore. At first, she wanted to tell him ‘no’, to bolt out of the window. Except he seemed to know how to soothe her fears. Hours later, she found herself on a jet for the first time in her life flying to New York with an uncertainty of what the future would hold.


	2. Chapter 2

Nearly two years had passed since Tony brought her here, and she was a different person entirely. No longer did she cower when people stared and gawked. She loved her wings and used them to her advantage as often as she could. Natasha and Wanda had quickly both wormed their way into her life, both being a huge part of her confidence boost. There wasn’t a day that went by that she wasn’t told by one of them that her wings were beautiful, unique and a gift. They’d tell her she was beautiful too. They made sure she never forgot. It took some time, but she quickly learned they were right. Just because she had something different than everyone else, didn’t make her ugly. They were uniquely hers, and she could never see herself without them. Tony convinced her to go to therapy, and she was glad she did. Even if he denied his own problems.

Along with her newfound self-esteem, she found her calling. Her specialty amongst the Avengers was of stealth, she had been good at it in the past, but now she was given proper training and flourished. Steve and Natasha were always her go to group for missions when recon was needed, there to protect her if things ever went wrong. She never failed her missions and found her the center of arguments on who would get to work alongside her. For once in her life, she felt loved and accepted. Along the way, she grew into her own through her team members. But that changed when Bucky came back.

He was quiet when he first returned, broken and damaged by the torture Hydra put him through. Y/N’s heart went out to him, she wanted him to feel safe and loved like she did. However, every time she would try to get close to him, he would shut her out. His eyes would widen in horror when she would enter a room and would bolt any chance he could. It was hard to watch him recoil in fear, but when she overheard how he complained to Steve of how he was disturbed by her wings. Flashbacks of her repressed past came rushing back to her, her world crashing down around her. It was like a switch had flipped in her, and she receded back into her mind. No longer was she the bubbly, happy woman everyone had come to love. She shied away from touch, would flinch when anyone would comment on her wings. She hid in the rafters, her wings wrapped securely around her to protect her from the outside world. She knew they were why he was terrified, and she had to remember, she really was a freak.

Steve hated to see her this way, but he thought it was just a fall back for a few days. When nothing changed months later he knew he had to do something.

* * *

“I don’t know if this is a good idea, Steve.”

He glanced over to the co-piolet seat, frowning at Y/N’s hunched over shoulders. She stared down at her fingers, picking at her cuticles.

“What do you mean?” He questioned, turning back to the dash. They were almost ten minutes away from their mission destination, and he couldn’t deal with the oppressing atmosphere much longer. Y/N let out a troubled sigh and glanced back to the big part of the heavy tension.

“I know he hates me, why did you put me on a mission with you two?” She whispered, hoping he didn’t hear. She missed Bucky’s jaw clench when she turned back to her nails. He heard it all and couldn’t find it in himself to argue.

It wasn’t that he hated her, she had given him no real reason to. But he found her and her abnormality a bit unsettling. The first time he had met her, she had swooped in from nowhere, her bony leathery wings spread wide as she landed beside him and Steve. While she herself was rather attractive, he couldn’t get past the way he could see each vein and bones, her skin so thin he could almost see through it in certain places. They were like giant bat wings and it was almost like a nightmare come to life. He hated that he felt that way about her, but it wasn’t something he could get past. At least he thought it wasn’t.

“He doesn’t hate you,” Steve answered, repressing a roll of his eyes. Y/N shook her head.

“No, he does. He might not tell you in words, but I know he does. I know what his looks mean, I’ve lived with them my whole life. He hates me.”

Steve’s mouth drew into a tight line, and while he wanted to argue with her, he knew it would be pointless. He had hoped that this mission would force the two of them to talk. All Bucky had to do was talk with the woman and know she wasn’t bad. She was a sweetheart, and he didn’t have anything to fear. Her wings didn’t define who she was a person, but they were apart of her life. So far, the two had done a miraculous job at avoiding each other in the tiny quinjet.

Y/N glanced back again at Bucky, sighing in defeat. She didn’t think anything Steve said was true but didn’t want to waste energy at the moment. The system beeped, signaling they were quickly approaching the missions drop point. Clicking on autopilot, Steve and Y/N stood to go to their gear at the back of the plane. It was a simple recon mission, one that Steve and Bucky would just provide back up for her. They needed information on a Hydra base in the mountains and found a way in towards the top. She needed to get in, find information and get out. Steve and Bucky would either stay back or find a way in themselves. Y/N had already been told if she found a way for them to get in, to do so. It was an easy mission, no one should get hurt. 

When the quinjet landed, the three moved to stand at the doors. Y/N didn’t notice where she stepped until Bucky made a noise in the back of his throat and lurched to the other side of Steve. Steve shot a glare over at his friend, who didn’t seem in the least bit sorry. Y/N’s shoulders slumped, her confidence dropping even lower than it was. The door opened, and Y/N wasted no time slipping out and unfurling her wings. Steve watched as she took off, his jaw clenched. Slowly he turned to Bucky, who suddenly found his gun interesting.

“I don’t know what the hell your problem is, _pal,_ but you need to pull your head out of your ass.” He hissed. Bucky’s head snapped up in surprise, but Steve was already out the jet and making his way to the Hydra base. Sighing, Bucky tilted his head up and clenched his eyes shut. He didn’t know why he found Y/N’s wings so unsettling. He knew he needed to get over it, he had to. She really was a sweet girl, and he could see how this was hurting her. But for some reason, he just couldn’t move on. Letting out one last breath of air, he followed behind Steve, hoping for the best.


	3. Chapter 3

It didn’t take her long to find a way in, a hidden air ducked that was just big enough for her to fit through, even with her wings. The corridors were large barely allowing her to slip through, her wings folding in close behind her and shielding her in corners when she needed it. It was almost too easy to get in, and she hadn’t seen or heard of a soul since. After a little searching, Y/N found a hidden door, hoping they were no alarms rigged to go off if she opened the door. Relaying the general location, she hoped that Steve and Bucky could find the door from the outside, a nagging feeling in the pit of her stomach growing as the seconds passed. Yet just like the rest of the mission, both had found the door easily, and when she slipped it open she was relieved there was no alarm. Perhaps Hydra thought they’d never be found out here. No, she thought, something else wasn’t right. 

“Alright, so if F.R.I.D.A.Y. is correct, we should take the next left turn and go to the door at the end.” Steve had memorized what little information they had on the base and knew the place with his eyes closed. He too felt that twinge of uncertainty but shoved it aside. Now wasn’t the time. Y/N noticed his slight hesitation and nodded, stepping up to lead the small pack through the halls. She was ready to spin around and pull the two in, hiding them behind her wings if needed. Fortunately, even in the near pitch blackness, she didn’t need it. Years of working in the dark had given her the benefit of much better eyesight, almost on par with the super soldiers. As she moved quietly through the halls, she couldn’t help shake the feeling that something was wrong. Where were the people, but more importantly, why were there no lights on? Not even an emergency lighting system was on, odd for any base.

“Somethings not right.” She muttered, eyes narrowing at the door in question. Steve and Bucky heard, silently agreeing with her. They too felt something strange in the air but couldn’t quite place it. Cautiously, Y/N pushed the door open. The door creaked open, showing a giant empty bay that seemed to be in the middle of the mountain. The sides were built with reinforced steel, while the ceiling was the carved rock of the mountains. Steve paused, frowning at the sight. Y/N stepped aside, letting both super soldiers in to examine the room. It looked vacant, large wooden boxes cover the floors, but void of anything else. There were still no signs of any movement, but the feeling of unease was still there.

“This shouldn’t be here,” Steve whispered, positioning his shield in front of him. Y/N nodded, taking a hesitant step into the room. Her wings stirred behind her, her nerves mounting by the second. Bucky’s eyes honed on the movement, a shiver going up his spine at the small twitch. Steve saw and elbowed him in the side, hard. With a narrowed glared, Steve followed behind Y/N keeping a close look around them.

In the center of the large hanger was a massive hole that seemed never-ending, strange placement in the large room. Cautiously, Y/N looked down, frowning at the darkness.

“What is this?” She asked aloud.

“I don’t know.” Steve wasn’t sure himself.

“I’m going to check it out.” Steve’s head began to shake, but Y/N was already pushing off the edge head first. He sighed with a touch of irritation, watching her disappear into the abyss without another word. 

Bucky stood feet away, eyes wide. He had seen her take flight before, but never this close. He preferred to keep a distance from her, to stand clear of her and her wings. As she unfurled her wings, a feeling of awe washed over him. He never knew just how large her wings were, nor the power she held in her skin. She was so sure with who she was in that moment, never doubted they would be there to catch her when she fell. Cautiously, he walked to the edge, looking down beside Steve with baited breath.

* * *

Y/N landed gently, the wind from her wings as she landed rustled the dust on the floor. Her nose wrinkled, telling herself that now wasn’t the time to sneeze. Alarm bells were ringing in her head, and every fiber of her being was telling her to run. She glanced up, the dim light seemingly miles above her. She had no idea what this was used for, and that little voice in her head told her she didn’t want to know. What should have been an easy mission, was quickly turning stranger and stranger. Shaking off the uncertainty, Y/N pushed forward.

Around her, steel walls nearly 10 feet tall reinforced the sides of the rocky walls, similar to the room above her. Behind her was a door made of the same steel, slightly ajar. More alarm bells went off in her head, but she had to push the troubled thoughts and keep on with the mission. Taking careful steps, Y/N pulled the door open, flinching at the groan of the metal. Darkness only greeted her, long empty corridors leading further into the mountains. Taking a deep breath, Y/N stepped into the black.

Her nerves were frayed, and every situation she could think of that could go wrong ran through her mind. At the end of the hall was once again another door, and now every fiber of her instinct was screaming to run. Sucking in air, she slowly pushed open the reinforced door. Unlike the groan of metal scraping against metal from before, there was a thunderous click. Her eyes widened in horror, blood running cold at what lay before her.

Turning at heel, she ran.

“You guys. We need to leave, now!” She cried into her comm, her voice an octave higher in fear. She didn’t stop running until she reached the end of the hall, pushing herself harder than she ever had and spread her wings wide before shoving off the ground.

Bucky and Steve stumbled backward, the strength behind the gusts of wind from her wings nearly knocking them over as she appeared from the dark hole. They didn’t have a chance to ask what she saw before they heard the explosion. It shook the entire base, followed by another loud explosion.

“Shit!” Bucky shouted, dodging a chunk of the rock from the ceiling. There was another explosion from below, smoke beginning to rise.

“This place is rigged with bombs! We need to go!” Y/N shouted, circling overhead. Almost in reply, there was another deafening explosion at the bottom of the hole. Smoke billowed from below, heat rising quickly with the fire from beneath. Steve and Bucky didn’t need to be told otherwise and bolted to the door. Another explosion shook the floor, the two stumbling a step before catching themselves. Y/N circled above them, dodging a rock that fell from the ceiling. She gasped, seeing the rock falling straight towards Bucky’s unknowing head.

“Bucky! Look out!” She cried diving after the falling rock. He looked back, eyes widening at the large rock, momentarily freezing. Y/N was quicker, knocking him out of the way before it could crush him. The both went crashing to the ground, tangled in limbs, her wings covering them both from the falling debris. 

“Are you okay?” She whispered, pushing off his chest from where she laid on. He grunted, his eyes clenched shut as he nodded. She bit her lip and stood quickly, her wings fluttering behind her. Bucky quickly jumped up, refusing to look anywhere near her. There was another explosion that shook the entire room, and Y/N didn’t have time to dwell on the pain.

“Come on.” She hissed, stepping away from his towering frame. Both took off to the door, Steve already standing there with a worried expression on his face. There was another explosion, this time in the room they were in. The force knocked them off their feet, both crying out as they were thrown in the air, landing feet from the door. Steve rushed back in, pulling up Y/N while screaming at Bucky. She stumbled to get her feet under, her head ringing from the sound. She blinked rapidly, the fire falling around them blinding her.

“Bucky!” Bucky groaned in response, pushing off the floor. He shook his head to lose the spots in his eyes, body screaming out in pain. He nodded to Steve and quickly pushed off the ground. Smoke filled his lungs, and he knew they needed to get out.

“I’m fine.” He shoved the two of them down the hall, grumbling under his breath. Y/N stumbled, falling behind the two, Steve in the lead. The explosions grew more frequent, closer than the last. She could feel the heat behind her and pushed herself forward. She couldn’t fall behind, they had to get out the door. The three rounded the corner and all but threw themselves out the side door. They weren’t out of the woods yet. They needed to get to the jet and get out of here before everything blew up.

They were halfway down the hill, they could see the jet where it was cloaked when there was one final explosion that rocked the ground. The three stumbled once again, Y/N’s legs giving out on her. The other two didn’t notice her fall, her far enough behind that she was out of their peripherals. She groaned, pushing up off the ground and glanced over her shoulder. Her breathe left her at what she saw. It was almost in slow motion, a large chunk of sharp metal flying through the air headed straight towards them. She turned, noticing it was aimed directly at Bucky’s back. She didn’t think, didn’t even stop to process her actions. Pushing off the ground she spread her wings, lunging at Bucky. Her arms wrapped around her torso, startling him when her wings wrapped protectively around him as they came crashing to the ground.

Bucky couldn’t panic, the darkness from her wings taking his sight. Her scream of anguish would always haunt his dreams, it was a soundtrack he could never forget. He hears a sickening crunch through her screams and metal embedding in flesh. Her grip tightens for a split second before going slack, her arms falling limply to his side. He feels, rather than sees, the warmth spread on his back, and then Steve’s screams ring through his ears. His heart stops when she slips off his back, her chest still. 

“No!”


	4. Chapter 4

The beep was the only thing keeping Bucky from losing his mind. He had been sitting in a hard uncomfortable chair, in a freezing room that smelled like rubbing alcohol and penicillin for the past 72 hours without leaving. Steve and Sam had both come in, near begging him to go get some sleep and eat. But Bucky refused. He couldn’t leave her side, he wasn’t going to let her wake up alone. He didn’t want to tell Steve that he had nightmares when his eyes closed at night. He heard her screams, felt the warmth down his back from her blood. She protected him, saved him from death, but at what cost?

The doctors said she would make a full recovery, however, there would be a price. She would need therapy, she would need someone there for her during the recovery stages. The surgery was extensive, yet it was needed. If they didn’t move forward with the surgery she would have died.

Bucky wouldn’t let her wake to find out the ramifications of her actions alone. She might hate him, she might finally despise his existence when she finally woke, but he wouldn’t leave her alone. Not when she deserved all the support she needed.

He was an idiot. Ever since the beginning, he judged her on her wings, that their gnarly appearance reflected her own. She was nothing like her wings, she was nothing but soft, kind and gentle with him. She knew he was feeling alone in the world, and it wasn’t until she was wheeled away that it hit like ton of bricks. She felt just as alone as he did and was trying to help him feel connected. She didn’t want him to feel what she felt. And he thanked her by running.

Bucky felt it was the least he could do, be by her side when she woke. Her life is changed completely, all because she jumped in from of shrapnel and protected him.

“Hey, Bucky.” The door opened, Tony stepping in. Bucky sat up in surprise, shifting in his seat. Tony stopped in the entryway, looking over the solider in the seat. Dark circles under his eyes, his hair was limp and greasy against his head. Tony wrinkled his nose, snorting softly.

“You look like shit.” He waved a hand, walking to the Y/N’s bedside. Bucky didn’t respond, his eyes looking over at her still form with broken eyes. Tony looked at him through his glasses before he turned to Y/N. Tubes and wires were connected to her body, keeping her breathing and alive. His heart sank at how she was laid out, gently running a finger down the black skin of her right wing.

“I have plans you know.” He started, voice low. Bucky acknowledged him for a slept second, his eyes pulling away from Y/N as he waited for Tony to finish before turning back to her. “I don’t know if she’ll like it, but I’m hoping she’ll be on board. I don’t know what it’s like, but you do. Think she’ll like it?”

Bucky didn’t respond for a moment, clenching his metal fists in front of him. He thought back to all the days he hated his arm, despised its exitance and what it stood for. Yet now, he couldn’t see himself without it. It was a part of him, just as much as his real arm was. It was a reminder of his past, but now it served as a reminder that he survived.

“Maybe not at first.” He spoke for the first time in three days, his voice rough. “She’ll come around though.”

Tony nodded, reaching down to squeeze her hand. He sighed loudly, blinking back tears as he stood taller.

“Well.” He sniffed, shoving his hands in his pockets. “I’m going back to my lab. I think you should at least shower before she wakes, don’t you?”

He didn’t wait for a response, just turned and walked from the room. Bucky sighed, knowing he was right. He could smell himself. Casting one uncertain look towards Y/N he stood. He’d only be gone for a few minutes. Hesitantly patting her hand, he walked out of the door, shoot a text to Steve that he was going up to the rooms for a few minutes.

~~

Twenty minutes later, he was showered, in a new set of clothes and was chewing mindlessly on an apple Natasha threw at him before he disappeared into the elevator. Dr. Cho reassured him that she hadn’t woken during his little break but was showing signs of stirring. Now it was just a waiting game for her to wake up. They already pulled out the breathing tube now that she no longer needed it and was only a matter of time.

Bucky had stood to walk over and throw away his core in the bin when he heard her groan softly. He was by her side in an instant, pressing the button on her bedside to alert the nurses. He cupped her cheek, whispering to her gently as she roused from her unconsciousness.

“It’s okay. You’re safe, in a hospital bed. Be careful not to pull your stitches.” He murmured to her softly, hoping she wouldn’t panic. Her heart monitor peaked right as the doctors and nurses rushed in. They ushered him away from her bedside so they could check her over before letting him back to her side. He all put elbowed them out of the way, taking her small cold hand in his large warm on.

Y/N woke in a dull pain, her left shoulder throbbing. Something felt different, she felt… uneven. She didn’t want to open her eyes, but she wanted to know if she was hearing things right. It sounded like Bucky speaking to her. That couldn’t be right. He hated her, didn’t he? Willing her eyes open, the world slowly came into focus around her, Bucky right beside her with his fingers laced with hers.

“Bucky?” She slurred, her throat sore. He shushed her gently, taking a cup with a straw from a nurse. He helped her sit up, again she felt different, and helped her suck down the liquid. Y/N warily glanced at the nurses around her, seeing the expression of pity on each their faces. Slowly, she turned back to Bucky, who had the same look.

“What happened?” She swallowed, a lump lodging itself in her throat. Bucky sucked in a shuddering breath, glancing at the nurses as if for help.

“You saved me, doll.” He spoke carefully. His blue eyes glanced behind her, darkening with guilt. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. You- They couldn’t- I’m so sorry.”

Y/N turned her head to the left, trembling as she did. Bandages were wrapped around her shoulder, looking freshly changed. A sob wracked through her chest at what she saw, or the lack of. Where she once had her wing that she spent her entire life coming to accept, there was nothing. Her hand flew to her mouth as she tried to keep in her sobs, but it all came crashing down on her. Her wing was gone, that’s why she felt so strange and off centered. They had taken her wings, her only sense of freedom.

“We did everything we could, but the infection spread too quickly. If we didn’t amputate it when we did, you would have died.” One of the nurses stepped up, gently patting her right shoulder. “I’m so sorry Y/N.”

Y/N nodded and through her tears say the nurses leave the room, leaving Bucky behind. He was holding back his own tears, his fingers tightening on her hand.

“Y/N.” His voice quivered, pressing a gentle kiss to the back of her hand. “I can’t say sorry enough, I know what you’re going through. I know what your feeling. I’ll never be able to undo what happened, but I wouldn’t let you do this alone.”

Y/N sniffed, brows furrowing in confusion. He hated her, was petrified of her existence. Why was he suddenly pledging his allegiance to her?

“What?” She croaked, turning away from her empty backside to look at Bucky. “Why would you do that?”

“You saved my life,” Bucky said. “Before you say it’s from guilt, it’s not. At least not completely. I know I was horrible to you, I judged you because of what you had and not for what you were. It wasn’t until I watched the wheel you away from me that it hit me; You tried everything you could to help me fit in and I brushed you aside. And you still jumped in front of danger for me. I didn’t know if I’d ever get the chance to repay you, to make up for everything I did to you.”

Y/n watched him fight with himself, his brows furrowing in frustration. He couldn’t believe he did something like that to you for so long. He didn’t even give you a chance. He was no better than everyone else that judge him without a second glance.

“I can’t repay you for it, I never can. But I’ll be damned if I let you go through this alone.” He spoke with such confidence, Y/N was surprised. “Please, I want to help you. I want to get to know you, to make up for being the shittiest human being ever for letting superficial things control me. I just-. “

Y/N squeezed his hand back as his voice broke, hot thick tears rolling down his cheeks. He took a breath to recollect his thoughts, once again stunned at how kind she was. Here she was, just having woke up to learn she lost her wing and she was trying to reassure him.

“I just wish I could go back and take it all back, to not let my fears run my life.” He locked eyes with Y/N, bloodshot and shimmering with his tears. Y/N let out her own sob, shaking her head vigorously in response. 

“It’s okay.” Bucky started to shake his head, but Y/N stopped him. She cupped his cheek, her thumb catching his tears. “No, it is. It’s okay. I forgive you, so please don’t beat yourself up for that. We all make mistakes. It hasn’t really hit me yet, that it’s gone, but when it does I need you there. Please don’t leave me when it gets hard.”

Bucky sniffed loudly, nodding his head in agreement. His heart ached, once again blown away at how forgiving and care she was. He leaned into her hand, his eyes slipping close to her cool touch. It will be hard, he knew that. There would be days she’d resent him, he already could see it happening. But he wasn’t going to let her suffer alone. Not when she suffered for so long.

“I promise. Through it all, I wouldn’t leave you.”

They’d do this. Together.


End file.
